Healing in the hurt January 17, 2008

For some reason, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about pain.. and hurting.. maybe because I’m surrounded so much by it in my work life.. my personal life.. It seems like everywhere I turn, there is someone hurting. And I’ve come to realized one important, common thing.. that it takes some ownership to find healing. Now let me explain.

 Being an innocent bystander.. there is no power.. no control in that. Being an innocent bystander does not allow anyone to move forward.  When the individual takes at least some responsibility.. for the pain inflicted.. or more importantly, the response to the pain.. that is when healing and resolution come. If you allow the pain to own you or the person who caused you that pain to control the situation, then I’ve found its much more difficult to find healing.

 And lets be honest.. whether its emotional.. physical.. mental.. we all have a choice to make. We all have a duty to guard our hearts.. respect our bodies.. develop our minds. And it is only through surrounding ourselves with others who are invested in those same desires that we truly grow. Easier said than done I realize.. but we’ve all got to find a way to find healing in the hurt..

Christmas fast approaching December 19, 2007

I would bet that it is safe to say.. that I am not the only one who is shocked to think that Christmas is less than a week away. It seems like just yesterday I was graduating and moving and starting a new job..

 Today, all those events seem like a distant memory. But why does it not feel like the Christmas season either? I’m not excited like I normally am.. I’m not in anticipation like normal.. as a matter of fact, I feel very.. unexcited.

 I have to work Christmas Eve and Christmas Day (night shift)..  Not 100% positive but I’m pretty sure my attitude towards Christmas this year is directly linked. Sure, I love my family. I love the Christmas lights and Christmas trees. I even love getting presents. But what I love most about Christmas.. is the Christmas Eve church service.

 The Christmas Eve church service is my favorite service of the whole year. Its one of celebration and rejoicing for the Incarnation.. for the arrival of Christ the King. And unfortunately, I have to miss it this year because I’ll be at work. So, I’m trying to work out how I can make Christmas a celebration.. even when I have to spend it at work.

 And then I’m reminded of my call. My call to serve. My call to be a nurse. Christ didnt call me to be a nurse just when I wanted to be or even when it was convenient for me. When the rest of the world is celebrating Christmas, I will be in the hospital. Caring for those who need it most. And although it may not be the traditional Christmas I’ve experienced, my Christmas will be more like the first Christmas.. I believe it will reflect the true meaning of Christmas. I will be serving those who are at their lowest… those who Christ served.. and those that need Christ in this world more than anyone. And hopefully, somehow, I will bring just a little piece of Him to them this Christmas.

So although my Christmas will be different this year.. I will still be in celebration..

My start… December 18, 2007

So I joined all the rage and started a blog. I figure since I’m on this crazy night schedule and often times find myself up at odd hours of the morning with no one to talk with, I can voice my thoughts here. I guess its a way to stay connected when at times I feel very much disconnected.